hidden image

Bob’s Banter by Robert Clements New Taxes and Tax Savings..!

Robert Clements Robert Clements
14 Jun 2021

With the state of the economy plummeting, and money needed to handle the running of the country, rumour has it that everything under the sun would be taxed, but I didn’t know how serious it was till I went for my daily jog this morning:
There was a stranger standing inside the park and watching all the people as they walked or jogged by. He watched me disinterestedly as I finished my first round, looked a little more keenly when I did my second and then put a tick on a piece of paper when I finished my third.
“Who is that?” I asked the watchman as I started my fourth round.
“He is the taxman sir!”
“What’s he doing here?”
“Collecting taxes!” said the watchman obviously wondering how I couldn’t figure out such simplicities.
“Stop!” said the taxman stepping forward as I was about to start my fifth.
“Why?” I asked slowing down but not stopping.
“You have to pay your advance tax!”
“Advance tax?” I asked surprised.
“Yes before you advance onto your fifth round you will have to pay taxes for the next five rounds!”
“How much?” I asked as a policeman who I had not noticed earlier came and stood next to the taxman.
“How many rounds do you normally do?”
”Twelve!” I said.
“Sixty-five rupees!”
“Why sixty-five, why not sixty?” I asked surprised.
“A new cess of five rupees we have levied towards a healthier country!”
“Don’t you realise that what I am doing is healthy? Why do you want to tax me for health then?”
“Another five rupees sir!”
“For what?”
“You are using this government park for expressing your views, till now it’s been free speech, but we’ve decided to tax speech as well! We cannot allow any freebies anymore!”
“This is madness!” I shouted.
“Policeman!” said the taxman quietly and I quickly pulled out the money, but not before the taxman brought out a thick wad of forms. “Fill everything in triplicate sir, and try to finish it before I leave the park, otherwise there is a penalty for late payment!”
   Like I said, with the economy taking a nose dive, everything is going to come under the taxman’s hammer, otherwise why would the taxman have suddenly turned to me and asked, “Sir does your father run?”
“He’s too old to run!” I said.
“Sir, there’s a non-running tax which is double the running tax, it would be in your interest that your papa runs from tomorrow, and you can do some tax-saving..!”
                               

bobsbanter@gmail.com

Recent Posts

No fascist order is truly invincible. Its strength rests upon fear, propaganda, and institutional takeover. Once those illusions are shattered by organised resistance, authoritarian power unravels wit
apicture Adv. Jijo Thomas Placheril
03 Aug 2026
Dharmendra Pradhan's resignation may have appeased public anger, but replacing one RSS ideologue with another exposes the government's strategy: sacrifice individuals, preserve ideology. The faces may
apicture Oliver D'Souza
03 Aug 2026
History has been kinder to Manmohan Singh than contemporary politics ever was. The Supreme Court's verdict affirms that integrity may be eclipsed by accusation for a season, but truth ultimately outli
apicture A. J. Philip
03 Aug 2026
The presence of white cassocks at Jantar Mantar was a quiet revolution. In a climate where fear has silenced many institutions, the Church affirmed that protecting youth, defending constitutional free
apicture John Dayal
03 Aug 2026
No reform can make NEET equitable because its structural design favours wealth over merit. Until the examination itself is abolished, commercial coaching, educational inequality, and the exclusion of
apicture Joseph Maliakan
03 Aug 2026
India's youth have opened a chapter that extends far beyond education. Unless the deeper structures of impunity, ideological control, and erosion are confronted, every resignation will remain merely a
apicture Cedric Prakash
03 Aug 2026
Unless India's youth convert street power into sustained institutional reform, today's celebrated victory will become tomorrow's forgotten compromise, leaving the structures that produced the crisis f
apicture Joe Eruppakkatt
03 Aug 2026
At marriage time, They scan our faces For caste marks The way a scanner Searches for bombs.
apicture Dr Suryaraju Mattimalla
03 Aug 2026
The children have already spoken with their wounds. Now parents, grandparents, uncles and aunts, speak with your votes and your voices.
apicture Robert Clements
03 Aug 2026
There are occasions that begin as award ceremonies but end up becoming journeys through memory. The first Fr. Xavier Vadakkekara–Kerala Club Award 2026, presented to well-known journalist Unni Balakri
apicture A. J. Philip
27 Jul 2026