hidden image

Bob’s Banter by Robert Clements New Taxes and Tax Savings..!

Robert Clements Robert Clements
14 Jun 2021

With the state of the economy plummeting, and money needed to handle the running of the country, rumour has it that everything under the sun would be taxed, but I didn’t know how serious it was till I went for my daily jog this morning:
There was a stranger standing inside the park and watching all the people as they walked or jogged by. He watched me disinterestedly as I finished my first round, looked a little more keenly when I did my second and then put a tick on a piece of paper when I finished my third.
“Who is that?” I asked the watchman as I started my fourth round.
“He is the taxman sir!”
“What’s he doing here?”
“Collecting taxes!” said the watchman obviously wondering how I couldn’t figure out such simplicities.
“Stop!” said the taxman stepping forward as I was about to start my fifth.
“Why?” I asked slowing down but not stopping.
“You have to pay your advance tax!”
“Advance tax?” I asked surprised.
“Yes before you advance onto your fifth round you will have to pay taxes for the next five rounds!”
“How much?” I asked as a policeman who I had not noticed earlier came and stood next to the taxman.
“How many rounds do you normally do?”
”Twelve!” I said.
“Sixty-five rupees!”
“Why sixty-five, why not sixty?” I asked surprised.
“A new cess of five rupees we have levied towards a healthier country!”
“Don’t you realise that what I am doing is healthy? Why do you want to tax me for health then?”
“Another five rupees sir!”
“For what?”
“You are using this government park for expressing your views, till now it’s been free speech, but we’ve decided to tax speech as well! We cannot allow any freebies anymore!”
“This is madness!” I shouted.
“Policeman!” said the taxman quietly and I quickly pulled out the money, but not before the taxman brought out a thick wad of forms. “Fill everything in triplicate sir, and try to finish it before I leave the park, otherwise there is a penalty for late payment!”
   Like I said, with the economy taking a nose dive, everything is going to come under the taxman’s hammer, otherwise why would the taxman have suddenly turned to me and asked, “Sir does your father run?”
“He’s too old to run!” I said.
“Sir, there’s a non-running tax which is double the running tax, it would be in your interest that your papa runs from tomorrow, and you can do some tax-saving..!”
                               

bobsbanter@gmail.com

Recent Posts

Bengal once welcomed missionaries who built schools, hospitals and presses, enriching the region's education, healthcare and reform. Today, priests are told to leave their parishes. The irony is devas
apicture CM Paul
17 Aug 2026
With Christians constituting barely 2.3 per cent of India's population, the charge of mass forced conversion defies logic. Yet anti-conversion laws pivot charity into "allurement," suspicion and crime
apicture Chhotebhai
17 Aug 2026
Dr RB Sreekala's work brings out something beautiful in Koodashappana: how a German Jesuit, Kerala's Malayalam tradition and Sanskrit learning came together to tell the story of Jesus in the language
apicture A. J. Philip
17 Aug 2026
Eighty years after Independence, the question is whether Indians remain free. With increasing threats to citizenship, dissent, faith and liberty, Swaraj demands a second struggle to defend freedom for
apicture Jacob Peenikaparambil
17 Aug 2026
The Old Testament is insistent on this point almost to the point of severity. When Moses approached the burning bush, he was told, "Do not come near; take your sandals off your feet, for the place on
apicture Dr K. M. George
17 Aug 2026
Nehru's Cabinet was surrounded by persons who did not share his ideology. They were retained mostly out of a sense of loyalty to old colleagues, persons who fought side by side for Independence.
apicture G Ramachandram
17 Aug 2026
You think I am a forbidden fruit, unworthy of your love. But I never think You are a forbidden fruit, Even though India forbids your Nagalim.
apicture Dr Suryaraju Mattimalla
17 Aug 2026
The truly confident leader does not need ridicule. He does not humiliate opponents or turn every speech into a performance about his own greatness. His strength is visible in restraint, fairness, humi
apicture Robert Clements
17 Aug 2026
Political independence was never Gandhi's final destination. He envisioned a Republic rooted in constitutional values, social justice and human dignity. Every Independence Day invites a single questio
apicture Joe Eruppakkatt
10 Aug 2026
The Arthashastra counsels engagement, accountability and informed leadership—not disappearance. A government that retreats from Parliament while students demand justice betrays not only democratic con
apicture A. J. Philip
10 Aug 2026