hidden image

Bob’s Banter by Robert Clements New Taxes and Tax Savings..!

Robert Clements Robert Clements
14 Jun 2021

With the state of the economy plummeting, and money needed to handle the running of the country, rumour has it that everything under the sun would be taxed, but I didn’t know how serious it was till I went for my daily jog this morning:
There was a stranger standing inside the park and watching all the people as they walked or jogged by. He watched me disinterestedly as I finished my first round, looked a little more keenly when I did my second and then put a tick on a piece of paper when I finished my third.
“Who is that?” I asked the watchman as I started my fourth round.
“He is the taxman sir!”
“What’s he doing here?”
“Collecting taxes!” said the watchman obviously wondering how I couldn’t figure out such simplicities.
“Stop!” said the taxman stepping forward as I was about to start my fifth.
“Why?” I asked slowing down but not stopping.
“You have to pay your advance tax!”
“Advance tax?” I asked surprised.
“Yes before you advance onto your fifth round you will have to pay taxes for the next five rounds!”
“How much?” I asked as a policeman who I had not noticed earlier came and stood next to the taxman.
“How many rounds do you normally do?”
”Twelve!” I said.
“Sixty-five rupees!”
“Why sixty-five, why not sixty?” I asked surprised.
“A new cess of five rupees we have levied towards a healthier country!”
“Don’t you realise that what I am doing is healthy? Why do you want to tax me for health then?”
“Another five rupees sir!”
“For what?”
“You are using this government park for expressing your views, till now it’s been free speech, but we’ve decided to tax speech as well! We cannot allow any freebies anymore!”
“This is madness!” I shouted.
“Policeman!” said the taxman quietly and I quickly pulled out the money, but not before the taxman brought out a thick wad of forms. “Fill everything in triplicate sir, and try to finish it before I leave the park, otherwise there is a penalty for late payment!”
   Like I said, with the economy taking a nose dive, everything is going to come under the taxman’s hammer, otherwise why would the taxman have suddenly turned to me and asked, “Sir does your father run?”
“He’s too old to run!” I said.
“Sir, there’s a non-running tax which is double the running tax, it would be in your interest that your papa runs from tomorrow, and you can do some tax-saving..!”
                               

bobsbanter@gmail.com

Recent Posts

A fundamental distinction must be maintained between carefully examining a case's facts and rejecting an institution's application on that basis, and making sweeping generalisations about an entire re
apicture Adv. Rev. Dr George Thekkekara
12 Oct 2026
Vismaya's public dissent, Riya's demand for justice, and Yashaswinee's defiance of political inheritance are a growing sign that young women are refusing to remain silent spectators. Their courage in
apicture A. J. Philip
12 Oct 2026
The book "Politics, Policy and Predictions: Views from the Front Row of Parliament" by Derek O'Brien, Rajya Sabha MP and leader of the All India Trinamool Congress Parliamentary Party, throws light on
apicture Marydasan John
12 Oct 2026
As Leader of the Opposition, Rahul Gandhi waves the national Tricolour from atop police barricades, and Union Cabinet ministers celebrate Prime Minister Narendra Modi's dubious silver jubilee—13 years
apicture John Dayal
12 Oct 2026
Gandhi need not return as another Mahatma. He can live through a generation that resists hatred without hatred, confronts injustice without violence, challenges consumerism, defends the marginalised a
apicture Jacob Peenikaparambil
12 Oct 2026
Formation is not merely about producing priests and religious who follow rules, recite the Creed and wear habits. It is about nurturing conviction, maturity and integrity.
apicture Fr. Anil Prakash D'Souza, OP
12 Oct 2026
What exactly are we celebrating when our festivities leave children gasping, elders struggling to breathe, animals terrified, and the air poisoned? Culture evolves with human understanding. The real t
apicture P. A. Chacko
12 Oct 2026
The press is the voice of the people. It carries the complaint of the pensioner, the cry of the assaulted woman, the anger of the unemployed graduate and the question the powerful would prefer nobody
apicture Robert Clements
12 Oct 2026
Corrective press notes are not substitutes for accountability. This crisis demands independent investigation, judicial scrutiny and reversal of the SIR. Institutional complicity is the gravest betraya
apicture Oliver D'Souza
05 Oct 2026
The revelations have shattered public confidence in the Election Commission. Gyanesh Kumar's continuance as Chief Election Commissioner is untenable. Whether through resignation or impeachment, he mus
apicture Cedric Prakash
05 Oct 2026