hidden image

Bob’s Banter By Robert Clements Our Festivals of Joy..!

Robert Clements Robert Clements
31 Oct 2022
“It’s Diwali sir, there is so much to be happy about. Listen to the sound of crackers, see the fireworks, and divas and taste our simple sweets, all spreading joy around,” said his pretty little wife happily.

“What’s wrong with you?” I said to my gardener last week as he stood with a crestfallen face before me. “Now you want money for Diwali, then your wife will want to buy new clothes  during Christmas and finally you’ll ask me for a big advance for New Year!”

“I am sorry sir,” said my middle aged gardener, the wet mud still fresh on his hands and the smell of manure clinging onto him.

“Sorry for what?” I asked crossly, “Sorry for so many festivals or sorry for asking me for money? Why don’t you save your salary and buy useful things for the house like a pressure cooker, a gas stove, maybe even a refrigerator.”

“Sir,” said the poor man, “can you come with me to my home right now?”

“Okay,” I said eager to see where he lived so I could haul him up, if he ever took leave. “Go ahead, I will follow you.”

We walked through the shaded avenues of the bungalows and posh buildings. I followed him, quite happy for the exercise but slowly beginning to sweat, till he suddenly took a turn into a small gully which I never even knew existed. The gully seemed to climb like a serpent up a huge hill.

“Hey,” I shouted, “are we going trekking?” The man did not answer. Not a bush or a tree grew on the hill. There was no space for them, as every inch was crowded in by a tin shanty or mud hut. It was the biggest slum I had ever seen in my life. Naked children ran about all over, chased by busy flies. I held my nose and walked, the smell that surrounded me could have been used instead of anaesthesia to knock me out.

Pipelines ran through gutters and out again. The gutters ran into huts and were too choked to go out again.

“Sir,” said the gardener, bending low to enter a thatched hut, “this where I live.”

I followed him and looked around. There was no place for a fridge and if there was, there was no electricity to run it. There was hardly any place for a pressure cooker. Three children ran all around me, as delighted as their mother.

“What are they so happy about?” I asked, looking with distaste at the dirt and the squalor.

“It’s Diwali sir, there is so much to be happy about. Listen to the sound of crackers, see the fireworks, and divas and taste our simple sweets, all spreading joy around,” said his pretty little wife happily.

I smiled as I looked at her and her three children. I smiled again as I looked at her happy husband.

In India we needed our festivals, I realized. It was sunshine that kept everybody going.

“Okay,” I told the gardener, “you can have your advance and there’s a bonus for you at Christmas!”

There were tears in my eyes as I saw sunshine in his..!

bobsbanter@gmail.com

Recent Posts

The RSS has spent decades building an international ecosystem of charities, cultural bodies, donors and political influence. Bhagwat's centenary outreach seeks to consolidate it. The West has noticed.
apicture Oliver D'Souza
07 Sep 2026
Bhagwat's New York sermon offered the world an India where diversity is sacred and every citizen belongs. Back home, the reality is far less harmonious: food, faith, dress, history and citizenship its
apicture Jacob Peenikaparambil
07 Sep 2026
If you ask me which was the greatest news story I reported or commented upon during my 53 years in journalism, I would answer without batting an eyelid: the eradication of smallpox from India.
apicture A. J. Philip
07 Sep 2026
The Taliban tried to silence Malala with a bullet. India's new fundamentalists wield sticks, censorship and intimidation. The weapons have changed; the instinct has not. Both fear the same enemy: a yo
apicture Cedric Prakash
07 Sep 2026
The Church cannot preach courage to its flock while practising caution in the face of persecution. When Christians are attacked and sacred spaces desecrated, polite memoranda are no substitute for act
apicture P. A. Chacko
07 Sep 2026
They write of democracy from rooms where democracy has never had to enter the kitchen, where equality is discussed beneath lights that never reveal the darkness outside.
apicture Dr Suryaraju Mattimalla
07 Sep 2026
According to Koenraad Elst, when Hedgewar started the RSS, he had purely pragmatic ends in mind. The first thing he had to guard against was British imperial surveillance. He carefully adopted secret-
apicture Thomas Menamparampil
07 Sep 2026
Perhaps Mr Bhagwat had brought this beautiful version of India in his luggage. Perhaps it had cleared American immigration because unity, unlike some Indians, is still welcome in the United States.
apicture Robert Clements
07 Sep 2026
You may be supremely happy that your Freedom of Religion Bill has received the President's assent and has now come into force in Maharashtra. But there is an irony that you may not have noticed.
apicture A. J. Philip
31 Aug 2026
India's children are discovering the power of protest. Their demands are modest. Safe classrooms, clean water, toilets, teachers and dignity. If governments silence those who expose these failures rat
apicture Jacob Peenikaparambil
31 Aug 2026