hidden image

Bob’s Banter By Robert Clements The Liquor Cabinet..!

Robert Clements Robert Clements
12 Dec 2022
Once a man returned home stone drunk. His wife was furious because just a week earlier he had promised to break the habit bit by bit.

A friend of mine sent me a forward today, purely in jest I think, which got me thinking. It went like this, ‘When someone asks, ‘Where is your festive spirit?’ … Is it wrong to point to the liquor cabinet?’

I felt sad, that the true meaning of the festival he was talking about had been lost but decided today, to talk to all of us, about the contents of that liquor cabinet:

Social drinking is increasing by the day, and there is not a party I attend that does not serve liquor, and with this comes the making of alcoholics. The man who drinks once a week, starts enjoying the daily tipple, first with friends and then by himself and finally fights a losing battle with the bottle.

This was what an addict said after a session at an A.A. meeting.

“Alcohol first gave me wings to fly,

Then took away the sky.”

Another quoted the Japanese proverb:

First the man takes the drink,

Next the drink takes the drink

Then the drink takes the man.

Once a man returned home stone drunk. His wife was furious because just a week earlier he had promised to break the habit bit by bit. “What about your promise,” she asked angrily. “Aren’t you trying to discard it?”

The man answered that he was trying his best, but he was proceeding in stages. It was just like chopping off the very word ‘habit,’ he explained: when you cut off the initial ‘h’ from the world, ‘a bit’ persists. Knock off the ‘a’ and the ‘bit’ remains!

Replied the wise wife, “when you finally decide to run away from the ‘bit’ you will find that ‘it’ is still remaining!

Sir William Osler, eminent Canadian Physician, was lecturing on alcohol. “Is it true,” asked a student, “that alcohol enables people to do things better?”

“No,” replied Sir William. “It just makes them less ashamed of doing them badly!”

Mukund: “Why do you drink so much?”

Raj: “I’m trying to drown my sorrows.”

Mukund: “Are you succeeding?”

Raj: “No, I guess I’ve learned how to swim by now!”

And here’s a warning in old English, read it carefully:

Drink not the third glass, which thou canst not tame,

When once it is within three; but before

Mayst rule it, as thou list: and pour the shame,

Which it would pour on thee, upon the floor.

It is most just to throw that on the ground,

Which would throw me there, if I keep the round!

So, dear friend, ‘If someone asks, ‘Where is your festive spirit?’ … don’t point to the liquor cabinet, point instead, to the Babe in the Manger..!’

bobsbanter@gmail.com

 

Recent Posts

Corrective press notes are not substitutes for accountability. This crisis demands independent investigation, judicial scrutiny and reversal of the SIR. Institutional complicity is the gravest betraya
apicture Oliver D'Souza
05 Oct 2026
The revelations have shattered public confidence in the Election Commission. Gyanesh Kumar's continuance as Chief Election Commissioner is untenable. Whether through resignation or impeachment, he mus
apicture Cedric Prakash
05 Oct 2026
It was never the powerful, privileged or educated who kept Indian democracy alive, but the poor who queued under the scorching sun to exercise their franchise. Now, the very machinery entrusted with p
apicture A. J. Philip
05 Oct 2026
The Opposition has a historic opportunity to unite against the erosion of electoral integrity and defend citizens' fundamental right to vote. Delayed response, political fragmentation and narrow inter
apicture Jacob Peenikaparambil
05 Oct 2026
India's institutions were supposed to be built on merit, independence and constitutional accountability. Yet, beneath their lofty credentials, kinship networks quietly reproduce privilege, compromise
apicture John Dayal
05 Oct 2026
Article 342 of the Constitution of India empowers the President to officially specify indigenous tribes, tribal communities, or specific groups within them as "Scheduled Tribes," in consultation with
apicture Pachu Menon
05 Oct 2026
I have seen the professional anti-caste intellectual. S/He arrives. S/He speaks. S/He refers to Ambedkar. S/He cites John Rawls. S/He quotes Michael Foucault.
apicture Dr Suryaraju Mattimalla
05 Oct 2026
Before recording a crime, obtain written consent from everyone involved
apicture Robert Clements
05 Oct 2026
How can greater knowledge be accompanied by greater wisdom, greater prosperity by greater solidarity, greater power by greater responsibility, and greater connectivity by genuine human fraternity?
apicture Br. Dr. Lawrence Soosai Nathan, OFM Cap.
28 Sep 2026
"Deus meus et omnia" ("My God and my All!") was St. Francis of Assisi's favourite prayer. According to early Franciscan accounts, most notably recorded by Brother Bernard of Quintavalle, Francis's fir
apicture Br. Cyriac George, OFM Cap.
28 Sep 2026