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Modification Of India

Modification Of India

Does India need Modification? Can we afford it? It is a multi-crore rupee question today. There are people who stoutly claim that Modification of India is the panacea for all ills.

First of all, India has to stand tall, tallest of all nations, taller than the world’s tallest 29,029 ft. Himalayas, they say. The world should begin to see it, acknowledge its existence and give a well deserving pat. We need a world label. Such is the chorus! An irrational itch!

There are quite many ingredients that go into the making of our nation the tallest. Our erections have to be monumental. Patel Saheb takes the cake for the time being. If Patel can, why can’t our deities? People of the world need to know that we worship deities and there should be none else than our deities standing tall with cloud-capped heads. If deities can, should we not have world record-beating grotesque grottoes proclaiming our glory, our wealth, our pride of manly devotion and the rest? Our world-record holding deities need to dwell in unpolluted atmosphere too. Bleeding hearts and maudlin damsels should not pollute the precincts of the holy of holies.

We need to set precedents to shine more than others.  We take pride in the fact that we have more latrines, even if dry and water-deprived. What is more important is to get into the Guinness Book even if mosquitoes, flies and vermin breed in those latrines built just close to people’s homes.  Such development-oriented ‘model villages’ will boost our records and proclaim our national performance with international glare.  Our statistics will do the work. We need a clean India to boost tourism and to ‘Make in India’ project a grand success and a mega circus.  Otherwise, foreign capital will not flow across the Ganges into India. Even if that means crawling before nations like America. The only way to get oil from Iran, thanks to Trump’s benevolent OK!

As part of Modification, we need to rewrite the Constitution. Overhaul it completely, if need be. Send it to the Family garage. Not just to change the colour of the cover. Inside pages also need colourwash and gear manipulation. After all, our Constitution was borrowed from alien constitutions. It was a foolish mistake. We have our own old traditions and grand religious books which should be used as guides to prepare the new Constitutional script. We will make it the fattest of all other world constitutions, with appropriate matter from our religious texts, mythological stories, sayings of holy pundits and quotes from illustrious scatter-brined politicians. It will beat all other world constitutions. If we plan to build the world’s biggest religious shrine, we also need our religio-social Constitutional text to beat all world records.

Our growing generation of children and youth should not be left behind.  They need to be grilled into our family way of thinking. Their text books need to be backed by our family ideology so that, in future, they will shoulder the responsibility of running the nation the ‘Family Way.’ Our senior citizens, past their ideological use, need to be cordoned off and sent post-haste to security precincts to ruminate over their past performance and to spend their sunset hours in peace and contentment.

Some short-sighted may say: address the question of poverty of large sections of the citizens and improve their purchasing power before we think big about making India shine best. Well, that is one way of looking at things. That is not the litmus test of people-oriented development. We need to have larger vision, mega hope and superior technology.  To ‘Make in India’ scheme a super success, we need to roll out Afghan-imported red carpets for our international business clients.

Now, in Osho style, let us straighten our back and take a deep sigh, and ask ourselves: Will we need such a Modified India? To feed people with umpteen promises by making sure people’s money flow into the national coffers? The last thing India stands in need of is the deification of any self-styled individual who may think that the nation’s wheels will not roll unless he is at the steering wheel. Modification and deification should not be the thing that we need in India today. The nation cannot be brainwashed into half-truths, unscientific theories, sentimental vibrations or mythological parroting. We don’t need plastic heads over our shoulders!

Our leadership should be able to instil confidence into us with fellow feeling among all its citizens. We can afford no longer to see hate walls rising between communities and religions and among human beings. Hate walls before deities shutting out women devotees. Nor can we allow people being used as fodder for political glorification. Nor should our fellow citizens be told to get lost because they are devotees of a different deity.

Sense and sensibilities first! No more Modification!

(Published on 12th November 2018, Volume XXX, Issue 46)