hidden image

Bob’s Banter by Robert Clements Vaccine and Waning..!

Robert Clements Robert Clements
18 Jan 2021

For nearly a year, the only reason many looked in newspapers or at TV screens was for news of the vaccine, and finally when the vaccine is ready to roll out, there is a waning of interest. “What’s the problem?” I asked an old man who had actually rolled up his sleeves many months before and was now rolling them down and had his arms in defensive knots, “Why this reluctance for the vaccine?”
“Rumours!” he whispered, beckoning me to a corner of the tea shop where we were sipping tea.
“What rumours?” I asked puzzled.
“That I will have to give my allegiance either to the Central government or the state rulers!”
“What?” I shouted incredulously.
“Yes,” he said, looking over his shoulder, “Both the centre and the state will tell me I am alive because of them, and I don’t know who I will believe, so I’d much rather not take the vaccine, and not have to make a choice!”
I sipped my tea in silence and stared at his full sleeved shirt.
“I don’t like to be obligated to anyone!” he whispered and I nodded that I understood, “Even if you buy me tea, I will buy you tea the next day!”
“Vaccine is here! Vaccine is here!” shouted a man at the entrance of the tea shop, “Centre says that all tea drinkers will be given the first shot free!”
“And what does the state say?” asked my reluctant friend.
“Pencil thin syringe needle, with attractive interns who will hold your hand, so you won’t feel the jab!” shouted another man at the entrance.
“See I told you,” said my new friend, “These offers are coming in everyday!”
“But nobody in the tea shop is going out for their shot!” I said wonderingly, “I wonder why?”
“We have all decided not to give our allegiance to the centre or state!” said a man who I realized was the brother of the tea shop owner.
“There’s a risk you could all fall sick!” I said gravely.
“Oh no we won’t!” said the brother of the tea shop owner beckoning to the owner his brother to join the table.
“Why?” I asked as the tea shop owner joined the conversation.
“Because of my tea!” said the owner beaming. “It has built absolute immunity to the virus!”
How?” I asked looking at my glass.    
“The municipality water I use is filled with bacteria!” he said, very matter of fact. “The tea has been adulterated with every bit of dirt under the sun! My kitchen’s cleanliness has never been monitored by the authorities…”
“You’re saying?” I asked.
“That our authorities have already provided us with immunity! So, who wants the vaccine?”
“The only problem is,” moaned my new friend, ‘we don’t know to whom we owe this favour; the state or centre?”
And as India’s covid cases go on the wane, nobody knows who to thank..!
 

Recent Posts

India's daughters are still treated as someone else's property, burdened by patriarchy, denied autonomy and forced to surrender independence. Rahul Gandhi's women-only gathering in Pune challenged thi
apicture G Ramachandram
14 Sep 2026
If changing the Constitution is difficult, changing the electorate may prove easier. SIR's mass deletions raise the disturbing possibility that Hindutva's route to a Hindu Rashtra may run not through
apicture Jacob Peenikaparambil
14 Sep 2026
This writer must admit to a vested interest in this story, as the Election Commission office in New Delhi erased his wife from the national capital territory's electoral rolls, and restored it only af
apicture John Dayal
14 Sep 2026
Reservation is not charity; it is a constitutional instrument of social justice. But leaving sanctioned posts vacant, replacing permanent employment with contracts and privatising public institutions
apicture Joseph Maliakan
14 Sep 2026
Children do not always need another lecture, correction or punishment. Sometimes they need an adult willing to listen beneath the behaviour and discover the unmet need. The language we use can rebuild
apicture Dr Arnald Mahesh SDB
14 Sep 2026
A 7.8 per cent GDP growth rate makes for an impressive headline. But GDP does not pay the rent, buy food or protect a worker from illness or unemployment. The country's growth remains incomplete until
apicture Jose Vattakuzhy
14 Sep 2026
He may speak of purity and pollution, tradition and order, custom and inherited authority.
apicture Dr Suryaraju Mattimalla
14 Sep 2026
To commemorate this historic occasion, the Departments of History, Sociology and Political Science organised a one-day state-level seminar in collaboration with the Internal Quality Assurance Cell (IQ
apicture Isaac Gomes
14 Sep 2026
Gentlemen, before telling women to stay at home, remember that the doctor saving your life, the judge protecting your rights, or the pilot flying your plane may be a woman.
apicture Robert Clements
14 Sep 2026
The RSS has spent decades building an international ecosystem of charities, cultural bodies, donors and political influence. Bhagwat's centenary outreach seeks to consolidate it. The West has noticed.
apicture Oliver D'Souza
07 Sep 2026